為什麼
還是忘不掉她
為什麼
她現在大概已經跟別的男人開開心新的生活
早就忘記我是誰
而我
還是一樣每天沉浸在悲傷當中
愚蠢
沒用
難怪她會覺得我是個廢物
因為我確實是
沒用的垃圾
愚蠢...
2012年12月29日 星期六
2012年12月28日 星期五
2012年12月27日 星期四
2012年12月26日 星期三
ironic world
人生就是諷刺
活在那想像的恐懼和假想敵中
黑白氣息的窗口
透露出那讓人哭笑不得的骷髏
是的
你們儘管笑吧
這家伙是上一個站在這裡笑的人
如果你們學得到教訓
那就儘管笑吧
不然最後只會變成黑白短片中那黑色幽默的丑角
活在那想像的恐懼和假想敵中
黑白氣息的窗口
透露出那讓人哭笑不得的骷髏
是的
你們儘管笑吧
這家伙是上一個站在這裡笑的人
如果你們學得到教訓
那就儘管笑吧
不然最後只會變成黑白短片中那黑色幽默的丑角
2012年12月20日 星期四
2012年11月22日 星期四
2012年11月16日 星期五
2012年10月28日 星期日
2012年9月30日 星期日
2012年9月5日 星期三
星星
分手第四個月了，雖然已經過了這麼久，雖然這四個月期間用盡各種方法，但還是幾乎每天晚上都失眠，回想起我們在一起的這段時間，我們大一就認識，大二在一起，一直到大四畢業前分手，這段時間內充滿了快樂和悲傷的回憶，老實說這種又甜又苦的滋味很難形容，也不知道該開心還是該難過
我是個木訥寡言的宅男，至少絕大多數的人都認為我木訥寡言，我也覺得很奇怪像我這種人當初怎麼會有人喜歡我，尤其是一個極為外向的女孩，妳總是擔任領導人的角色，而我總是默默在旁邊聆聽，必要的時候才會講話，不過在熟的人面前我還自認為滿會搞笑的，我想是因為從小習慣那種美式的黑色幽默，所以特別愛開玩笑來娛樂大家，至少在熟的人面前，大多數的時間我總是在沉思，在做事之前我總是想要把事情想清楚，該謹慎的時候謹慎，沒法謹慎該賭的時候就賭，妳剛好跟我相反，妳總是在跟大家哈拉，和大家打成一片，有的時候還真羨慕妳，大家總是把妳捧在手上，我只不過是一個陪襯而以
雖然我們是在社團裡認識的，不過在大一大二這段期間我還參加了不少社團，而且很奇怪社團裡總是女多於男，其中也有不少不錯看的，妳還滿常吃醋的尤其是在我跟社團裡的女生有說有笑時，但是我從來就不曾出軌過，連精神出軌都沒有，我是個公事公辦的人，也絕對不跟女生單獨出去，當然有時候會跟一群女生出去，但那是因為社團女生本來就比較多，而且也都是為了處理公事，妳也時常和一些男生走得很近，至少在我看來有肢體接觸就已經超過我的底線了，但是我總是不斷說服自己不要吃醋，我不知道妳是怎麼想的，也許是我這個人太一板一眼了吧，覺得普通的異性朋友之間該遵守某些規矩，不過當我在路上和妳不認識的女生打招呼時妳都會瞪我，也許是開玩笑但那讓我覺得很不舒服，參加社團活動時妳也時常守在門口，等著我活動結束來興師問罪
我是個理科阿宅，腦子裡總是記著無數的公式卻不記得情人節和交往紀念日，常常念書念得太認真結果被妳打斷而生氣，大學前兩年絕大多數的時間都奉獻給社團和妳，成績一蹋糊塗，當然我不想為自己找藉口，有些人還是可以三者兼顧得很好，我一直努力想要兼顧這三方，不過至少是失敗了，在大三上為了搞社團還讓我的電磁學全班最低分被當掉，後來重修時比第二高分的學弟妹高了快20分，我還沾沾自喜得請電磁學教授幫我寫研究所推薦信，結果某天教授叫我把原本他寫的推薦信拿給他要幫我重寫，後來我同學才告訴我教授認為我是很混的學生，是我同學幫我說好話才讓教授幫我改寫推薦信，我聽到之後非常難過，我告訴你這件事情妳也非常難過，妳一直覺得是妳害我成績變差，也許我曾經在隔天要考代數期末考的情境下對你發脾氣，但我沒有怪妳的意思
我猜妳父母大概也不太喜歡我，我有一種感覺他們似乎認為我太內向沒啥擔當，也許他們是對的
我認為我們之間的關係有一道補不起的裂痕，那個裂痕大概是在大三上我擔任營隊總籌那次開始的吧，因為你之前已經對我們一起待的社團感到疲憊，加上我這個人很天真總是想要試著改善某些存在已久的缺點，所以自願出來接營隊總籌這個重要卻又燙手的山芋，在這段期間妳擔任我的副手，妳總是豪不猶豫的在眾人面前數落我或是和我作對，可能是因為妳天生就有的領導人特質讓妳這麼做吧，但是這讓我覺得當初妳不想承擔營隊的責任現在卻好像把我當傀儡一樣操控，許多計畫包括如何改善過去的一些缺失都是我在規畫的，我覺得自己要承擔一個將近百人的營隊卻又要被自己的女朋友唱反調讓我倍感壓力，最後那段可怕的日子終於度過了，我的責任也卸下了，最後還拿到社團評鑑的最佳營隊獎，但我一點都不開心，我也不想去領獎，因為妳仍然塑造了一個以妳為中心的團體，我只是個陪襯，雖然我不在乎什麼名和利，但是這過程我承受了眾多的壓力和構想許多細節，到頭來還是只能站在妳的背後聽大家讚美你多麼優秀，我心中有一種莫名的孤獨感
我把妳給我的東西都藏起來了，除了這本Strang寫的線性代數，這本書我還記得當初我們剛在一起的那個冬天，妳問我想要什麼聖誕禮物，我說我想要Strang寫的線性代數，妳就買來送給我，妳很會照顧人，反觀我就只是一個活在自己世界的宅男，我既不懂得照顧人也不體貼，當妳說妳在韓國有一個人追妳他很會照顧人的時候我很難過，因為也許妳是需要一個很會照顧妳的人，我沒辦法陪在妳身邊，妳是個開朗總是可以炒熱氣氛的女孩，妳也擁有許多朋友，妳怕孤獨，也總是怕我孤獨，所以過去妳時常陪在我身邊照顧我，但也許我天身就是孤獨命，我從來都不覺得孤獨，即使只有我一個人，直到妳出現，妳耀眼的光芒和我對妳的愛讓我找不到自己的容身之處，這時候我感到非常孤獨
我把我大學4年裡的大事情都回顧一便，好像都和妳有關，不知道妳有沒有把我給妳的東西都丟了，不知道妳有沒有交新的男朋友，我都不敢開FB，因為我知道我很脆弱，都已經四個月了，家人朋友都安慰過了，一直對自己洗腦我會好起來，但是看到線性代數還是忍不住難過，還有聽到桃園機場也是很難過，因為那是我送你出國前最後一次在一起的地方，之前還問化學系的朋友，如果我只是一個有機體，意識只不過是由電子訊號所組成，那為何會為了這種事情難過這麼久，這種愛和恨混在一起的回憶真的很奇怪...
希望妳在韓國過得很開心
2012年9月3日 星期一
2012年8月30日 星期四
2012年8月12日 星期日
2012年7月12日 星期四
All Gummed Up Inside
I can't keep pushing this down any deeper.
Why do I keep trying if I can't keep her?
Every move that I make is just another mistake.
I wonder what it would take because it feels like there's a hole inside my body.
Like there's a hole inside my heart.
It's like this feeling is gonna consume me if I keep waiting for this thing to start.
Oh, I feel like I'm all gummed up inside.
It's like I'm all gummed up inside.
It's like I'm all gummed up inside.
Why do I keep trying if I can't keep her?
Every move that I make is just another mistake.
I wonder what it would take because it feels like there's a hole inside my body.
Like there's a hole inside my heart.
It's like this feeling is gonna consume me if I keep waiting for this thing to start.
Oh, I feel like I'm all gummed up inside.
It's like I'm all gummed up inside.
It's like I'm all gummed up inside.
2012年7月9日 星期一
it's hurt
it really hurt
但是我已經不再是個男孩
謝謝妳陪我走過的那段日子
陪著我一起成長
雖然很痛
但是該道別的時候還是要說再見
再會了
相信妳未來一定會很幸福的
我也要去完成自己的故事
但是我已經不再是個男孩
謝謝妳陪我走過的那段日子
陪著我一起成長
雖然很痛
但是該道別的時候還是要說再見
再會了
相信妳未來一定會很幸福的
我也要去完成自己的故事
2012年7月7日 星期六
2012年7月1日 星期日
2012年6月30日 星期六
2012年6月29日 星期五
2012年6月28日 星期四
2012年6月2日 星期六
2012年5月31日 星期四
2012年5月30日 星期三
loves you lately
You packed your last two bags. A taxi's 'round the bend.
You used to laugh out loud, But you can't remember when.
You lost your lies. It's like your moving out of time,
And the whole world crumbles right beneath you.
So, I might've made a few mistakes,
But that was back when you would smile,
And we would go everywhere,
But we ain't been there for awhile.
And this I know, There's a place that we can go-
A place where I can finally let you know.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
We're the only ones that around,
We're the only ones that around this Babylon.
I hope you find whatever you've been lookin' for.
Just remember where you're from and who you are,
'Cause there's a thousand lights that'll make you feel brand new,
But if you ever lose your way, I'll leave one on for you.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
So, come back, get here, sit down. Relax.
Everything's to see that you've come a long, long way,
And it's the place that you should be.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
We're the only ones that around this Babylon.
You used to laugh out loud, But you can't remember when.
You lost your lies. It's like your moving out of time,
And the whole world crumbles right beneath you.
So, I might've made a few mistakes,
But that was back when you would smile,
And we would go everywhere,
But we ain't been there for awhile.
And this I know, There's a place that we can go-
A place where I can finally let you know.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
We're the only ones that around,
We're the only ones that around this Babylon.
I hope you find whatever you've been lookin' for.
Just remember where you're from and who you are,
'Cause there's a thousand lights that'll make you feel brand new,
But if you ever lose your way, I'll leave one on for you.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
So, come back, get here, sit down. Relax.
Everything's to see that you've come a long, long way,
And it's the place that you should be.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.
You and me, we got this great thing.
We're the only ones that around this Babylon.
2012年5月28日 星期一
All Out of Love
I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you hurt too, but what else can we do?
Tormented and torn apart
I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
For times when my life seems so low
It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring
When today doesn't really know, doesn't really know
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right, believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you, are you feeling it too?
Does the feeling seem oh so right?
What would you say, if I called on you now
Saying that I can't hold on
There's no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I'll be gone... I'll be gone
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right, believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I cna't be too late, I know I was so wrong
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late, I know I was so wrong
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right, believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you hurt too, but what else can we do?
Tormented and torn apart
I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
For times when my life seems so low
It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring
When today doesn't really know, doesn't really know
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right, believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you, are you feeling it too?
Does the feeling seem oh so right?
What would you say, if I called on you now
Saying that I can't hold on
There's no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I'll be gone... I'll be gone
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right, believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I cna't be too late, I know I was so wrong
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you?
I can't be too late, I know I was so wrong
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right, believing for so long
I'm all out of love, what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
2012年5月27日 星期日
2012年5月13日 星期日
2012年5月2日 星期三
2012年5月1日 星期二
2012年4月30日 星期一
2012年4月29日 星期日
2012年4月4日 星期三
4/4
該死的爛日子
Daughtry - September
How the time passed away
All the trouble that we gave
And all those days we spent out by the lake
Has it all gone to waste?
All the promises we made,
One by one they vanish just the same.
Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly by
But the memories remain.
In the middle of September
We'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end
Now it all seems so clear,
There's nothing left to fear
So we made our way by finding what was real
Now the days are so long
That summer's moving on
We reach for something that's already gone yeah
Of all the things I remember
Summer's never looked the same
The year's go by and time just seems to fly by
But the memories remain.
In the middle of September
We'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end
We knew we had to leave this town
But we never knew when we never knew how
We would end up here the way we are
Yeah we knew we had to leave this town
But we never knew when and we never knew how
Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly by
But the memories remain.
In the middle of September
We'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end
Daughtry - September
How the time passed away
All the trouble that we gave
And all those days we spent out by the lake
Has it all gone to waste?
All the promises we made,
One by one they vanish just the same.
Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly by
But the memories remain.
In the middle of September
We'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end
Now it all seems so clear,
There's nothing left to fear
So we made our way by finding what was real
Now the days are so long
That summer's moving on
We reach for something that's already gone yeah
Of all the things I remember
Summer's never looked the same
The year's go by and time just seems to fly by
But the memories remain.
In the middle of September
We'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end
We knew we had to leave this town
But we never knew when we never knew how
We would end up here the way we are
Yeah we knew we had to leave this town
But we never knew when and we never knew how
Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly by
But the memories remain.
In the middle of September
We'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end
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